still alive


25.11.2015

Saw your face
an old photograph in nothingness
eternity washed clean
by weeping
minds changed
stay I pray
over and over

abstract images run through the mind
electrical streets named after birds
we were beautiful
in the afternoon
taking care of each other
vowing forever to love
and burden the soul

love is to trick
trick is to love
love is…
mythical assassins
gas masks
against poison
love is the thing
that shudders
that blooms in sickness
love tags along
love sits by the lake
and thinks about love
love loves to love

in the photo
anyway
you wore shades
barely could see your eyes
you said you were surprised
I kissed you
in the night
the new year exploded above us
wild impulsive times
of dying naïve love
I felt at home

later, abandoning you
listening to dreams
in front of the mirror
alone
left to my own fate
the mind roaming empty
but she was safe
under new impulsive kisses
dark rooms and crumpled bed sheets
probably happy
hope=happy

first love?
a crush?
easy to disassemble
easy to analyse
easy to think about
easy to get shelves
and shelve the love
easy to love
hard to love
easy to tremble
hard to stay still

the dress unbuttoned
a hand raised and eyes black
biting and powerful
deathly feminine perfume
all that

but I see you smiling
playing the piano
flowers in the mind
pink lips and grey thoughts
sudden ideas of mad

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